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Dress in all black.”

My mind raced with questions. Our three shovels were soon taken away because, according to them, our progress had slowed. Find out what we’re looking for here and send us a pitch at pitch@huffpost.com.

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The Leader, the nickname for our main pledge master, was waiting for us at the entrance gate.

“Leave your phones in the car,” commanded the intimidating young man with a permanent frown, tightened jaw, and ghostly pale skin.

After I stepped out of my truck, The Leader pointed down a road. It was a chance to embrace our imperfections and let go of judgment.

When it was my turn to share, it felt right to reveal an intense trauma that I had kept hidden for years.

Visit RAINN’s National Sexual Assault Online Hotline or the National Sexual Violence Resource Center’s website.

Do you have a compelling personal story you’d like to see published on HuffPost? We cleaned rooms in the house together, ate all of our meals together, and studied for hours together.

It’s a testament to the progress we’ve made as a society, and a reminder of the work still to be done to ensure that everyone, regardless of their sexual orientation, can find a place where they feel accepted, respected and valued.

“Beach Night” was truly a turning point in my life, and from then on, everything was different.

Here, I thought, no one would hear me screaming.

Just when I started to wonder if this was all a prank, through the dense fog and rain, I saw the silhouettes of my other pledge brothers lined up beside a lifeguard tower.

You’re one of the coolest guys I’ve met, Tanner. Time seemed to be holding its breath.

Suddenly, The Leader’s voice broke the stillness.

“Come back!” he called out, with a hint of compassion. One pledge brother led the charge, racing ahead with unmatched determination, but soon, “PLEDGE CLASS OF ONE!” erupted from another brother.

Growing up, I idolized shows like “Blue Mountain State” and movies like “Animal House,” which inspired my fantasies about Greek life. Soon, the pledge masters began punishing us for no other reason than to make us suffer.

Courtesy of Tanner Aiello

Our first punishment was a sprint to the nearest lifeguard tower and back.

My scrawny body struggled to keep up with the others, which was even more difficult thanks to the three previous weeks I’d spent staying up late and drinking heavily. It was a feeling of being part of something greater — a fraternal, barbaric elation I’d never felt before.

We advanced towards the ocean with our arms interlocked.

I was living the college experience I’d always dreamed of, filled with fun parties and new friends.

The upperclassmen welcomed me as their first openly gay member, too. When I signed up to rush, I was seeking the real college experience, complete with large backyard parties and drunken antics with friends. In the car with me were four of my pledge brothers.

“It’s got to be beach-related,” said a brother from the back seat, his voice barely audible over the rain pounding on my windshield.

Hazing: My Journey as Fraternity's First Openly Gay Member
This personal narrative recounts the author's experiences as the first openly gay member of a fraternity, exploring themes of belonging, acceptance, and the dark side of hazing.
On a cold, stormy September night in 2018, my 14 fraternity pledge brothers and I received this ambiguous text from one of our pledge masters: “Tonight’s education meeting is canceled.

“Then, turn right at the boardwalk and continue until you find the rest of your pledge class.”
My heart raced as I imagined what might be about to happen.
We stepped into the rain and walked down a steep residential side street faintly lit by street lamps. What if alcohol or drugs had been involved, as they often are in hazing incidents?
What if someone in the circle that night felt coerced into telling a secret he was not ready to share?
What if fraternity members had used the shared secrets to harass, humiliate, or expose their pledges publicly?
We must stop normalizing hazing as a rite of passage and instead develop and share healthier team-building practices like these ones developed by StopHazing.
The real story of hazing at USC fraternities
As it turns out, there is much more to this story of hazing at USC.
In 2018—the same fall that Aiello was experiencing “Beach Night”—his fraternity, Tau Kappa Epsilon (or TKE), was on social suspension because of previous hazing cases.